Don't you ever go away. With or without a relationship.

Sweet love, for you, I'm breaking hearts.
Tell me if this is worth it.
Risking our 7 years of friendship.
Then again, no relationship just yet.
I'm still not over J.
Anyone has a delete memory power, kindly give it to me so I can fucking move on a.s.a.p.

I'm a little bit over you, J Ng.

I'm doing good at moving on now that I forgot to stalk you on facebook for 3 days.

I miss you always. Even when we don't talk. I miss you all the time. Every day, I think of you even when I'm out with my other halves. I miss you now. I miss you always. But how could you know that?

I'm over you. Just a little bit. I need to try harder.

A, slow down a little bit please. I want to be single.

I don't think I want to play anymore.
I don't want a relationship now.
I don't want you to be my other mistake.
Coz J, is enough for a mistake.

When I fall, I won't be afraid.

Gone through thick and thin. This girl I'll treasure and keep.
Chantelle, I love you so much.



These 2 boys are my every reason why I'm working hard.
Our friendship, I'll never let go.

When I fall, I'll stand up and tell them, I'm okay.

Thoughts for my Sunday.

Boss asked me out. Anddd, not done yet. He's married.

p.s. Nadiy, I know you're laughing your ass off. Get that big daddy? ;) HAHAHA. I'm not gonna take your advice on going out with him.

LOVE YOU NADIY!

Thoughts for my Sunday.

Seriously, boys who ask a girl out for a date, then say they have no money, and have the girl pay for lunch, is amazingly a major turn off. Just what are they thinking? Girls just laugh it off, putting a fake smile and prolly, make them feel a little bit better, by saying, "Nah, I'll pay for lunch." Simply means, this boy's a loser.

Thoughts for my Sunday.

Conferment letter on my Diploma.

On my graduation day, I want Atok and Nenek to watch me on stage receiving my diploma instead of my parents. And I want Joel to be present instead of other boys. Because, the boy that made a difference to my journey in poly, is Joel; my favourite boy.

When they go, "My love for you will never fade." F off luh.

The dating game is never fun when boys think they have your heart. Deep inside, you know the key to your heart is with someone else.

When everyone thinks I'm over J. I'm moving on. For real.

I am still crying over J. 4th time I broke down whenever friends mentioned his name. Embarrassing. If only there's a delete button in the human memory. Life would be awesome. Oh what the heck.


And of course, Awesome, thank you for today. My Fridays with you have always been lovely. "We don't have to be in a relationship to love each other."

Tell me if my English isn't simple enough."We can only be friends." Seriously, boys should stop pushing their luck. I am freaking tired.

*click on the picture to enlarge (strictly for dumb people)

I'm a freaking lesbian. Boys, fuck off.

p.s. I am kidding. Lesbianity. Not me.

Joel Ng.

I want to be like you. Someone who has vision in life.

Breaks me inside.

Breaks me inside.

Wow, seriously, at the rate you're adding girls on facebook, I gotta stop stalking you.

Don't think too much. I never like you.

1) You are possessive.
2) You get jealous when I talk about J.
3) You get upset when I go out with boys.
4) You are a control freak.
5) Most importantly, you don't like my friends.

Fuck off luh.

Mum, my Monday's blue because of you.

"Be home by 8. I gotta ask you something." - Mum

I knew it was about the bikini and the cigarettes in my bag that was left unzip. My bad.

And so I have John.

John, you're chinese. Don't you get it? Then why the fuck I broke up with J. Just that reason.

Fark Sunday.

Everyone's being a dork right now.

Home Saturday.

"I realized your behaviour changed ever since you broke up with Joel. You're becoming wilder."-Mum.

Seriously Mum, it's not about J or not. It's all about how you look at me. Period.

Home Saturday.

Friday was amazing. I am still exhausted, am feeling under the weather in fact, from yesterday's cycling in the rain. It was fun with you and what more could I possibly ask for. I wasn't too keen about going out today because my tailbone hurts, I wish I know the reason why and my head still throbbed dully. But seriously, thank you for yesterday.

You were fantastic. It was fantastic. The plan was lame, but the hours we spent our Friday was beautiful. I cherished every single second. Your confession. It touched me. That’s how much I’d treasure yesterday, even though it wasn’t even a week since the last time I saw my absolute favourite smile.

Home Saturday.

"GIRLS THAT SMOKE, NOT ATTRACTIVE."

Yeah, I'll work on that.

Time after time and things stay the same.

I tell everyone that we're through. It brought me to tears. This Sunday. Am contemplating. You don't feel me and I can't believe I still want you.

Let's slow down a little bit yea?

He's working his ass off for my future. He claims. His mum knows about me.
This is serious.
Slow down a little bit.
I'll appreciate that.
Give me time. At least.

How sad.

How sad J...

"I miss you a bit."

p.s. It's time I really move on.

FML moments.

I'm not at my best state right now. At times like this, when I need my two girls the most, just wish, they'd give me a call.

"Do I even have best friends? Or are they just a title to complete my life?"

And I seeked the term 'best friend' in dictionary.com if you're slow enough,

"A best friend will back you 100%. They will be honest with you and support you whenever you need help."

So, to the question, no, I don't have bestfriends, anyway.

I have a problem with the truth.

I got the point that I should leave you alone, but we both know that I'm not that strong.

Will you even think of leaving me? Can you smell my fear?

"You're my best girlfriend", says J.

Our time has finally come but we didn't forbid goodbye. For this ending is our new beginning. As friends.

Joel Ng, you're my one and only Teddy. Still stays the same no matter what. And I hope Claudia Nadz Ng stays in you. I'll always love you. Thank you for everything.

p.s. J, I know you're reading this.

Chasing dreams.

When I was a little girl, I dreamt to be a teacher.
I've achieved that dream.
Now that I am 19, I dream to be a marketing director.
And after 5 years in the business industry, I want to go back to teaching.
But this time, I want to be a business lecturer in Nanyang Polytechnic.
Do you think I can?

Work has never been boring

"Teacher, we sing you malay song. Your boyfriend cannot sing malay song for you."

Things don't always happen the way we want. But fuck it. Face it already.

For some reason, I'm jealous of girls with malay boyfriend.

If only J's malay, everything would be perfect.

Now as it seems, I feel we're hanging.

Period.

Spells Nadiy.

Nights that I'd always look forward to, that makes me really, really, really glad I know someone just like you.

I love you brother.

p.s. Me and you. We're kinda screwed. Tried hard. And now, I'm tired.

Love Friday.

Thank you so much Awesome.

I love Fort Canning with you.

Mum, Dad. Stop it.

Mum and Dad were prolly thinking sis and I were sleeping soundly at the back of the car. I wasn't. I was listening secretly to Dad's lame jokes and having Mum, giggling sheepishly at his '0h-so-funny' jokes.

p.s. If this is what we call love, god, save me.

How long more J?

Why are we hanging?

If you're a man that you are, figure this one out.

You need to try and save me.

It's okay that we're dying but I still need to survive.

"Babe, this is how I feel about us." - says he.

In honesty.

I had a jerk for lunch. For real. I wish I am lying. The meal I had was called, 'Jerk Bbq Chicken'.
p.s. No sarcasm intended. (though I don't really know what p.s. is)