And you say this is fate, then i must say SCREW FATE

I broke up
the next thing i knew,
the other asked me to be his
and we're not even close friends boy!

"There'll be a point of time where i fucking hate boys, and this is it."

Baby, fly me to the moon like what we've planned

Because it's her who hears me out
gave me tight hugs me when i'm down
wiped my tears and tell me jokes for my smile
assure everything's going to be fine
and remind me it's my heart that's the most important
baby, i really love you

and here's Oliver, never fail to cheer me up
giving me sweet 'letters' everytime i'm feeling my lousiest

one of the letters he gave me

Oli, I've always loved you though i don't show

And to you, baby
tonight was one of those nights that i wish i could replay over and over in my mind
at my own leisure,
for once i knew, i made the right choice
baby, thank you, and you've promised you'll never leave me

Teardrops on my....paper

Lately, I felt so down everytime I think of school
Not coz of studies,
I'm managing well with that despite the skipping of classes thank god
But, yea..him, again
I'm really lost uh, serious shit



I met Shalini and Philip
And we happened to talk about him
One thing, I realised, I can NEVER
talk or think about him
Coz I'd just break down and cry endlesssly
And Philip said, "At least, you know it's from your heart. Take it slow girl."
Uhhuhh, things go too fast, way too fast


It's hard, really
I really hope he's doing fine
And I kept telling them I miss him a lot, as if it'd help
But, at least, it was off my chest
I so need to see him, badly, but then again, Nadz, get a life! F***



So, today, I got myself a girlfriend
Her name's Lily
We love each other but suddenly, we decided to confess something
And we said, at the same timing,
"Darling, I wanna break up."
We looked at each other in the eye, hug, and then we laughed!
And I screamed
"Fuck! That was my shortest relationship!"





"Lily, thanks for the memories even though they weren't so great. HAHA."

Up and Down Monday

Rushing to school with heels and a skirt was a bad start
Screwing up in two presentations couldn't be a lot worse
And there you have, the only one who can make you smile
All excited to see him even if it's JUST a cd
But, things just have to go wrong
That i should say, shattered
Then again, how much can you react?
You can only pretend that you don't care a bit
It's really annoying when you know what you really want but you just can't get it?
But, what the eff, I'm tired
I miss you a lot
But fuck, whatever
Why do I even bother smsing?
Such dumb shits

Monday is a 'skip-classes' for our clique
We lunched and crashed at Ben's apartment
I wasn't as hyped up as I was in the morning before seeing him
Everyone asked, but all I could say, Don't ask, I'm fucking tired.
All I did was sleep with Theo's HUGE teddy
The clique played poker and Xbox
I couldn't sleep well, coz yes! The music, it was effing LOUD!
And then we found a trolley!
So yes, what can you expect from us? :)

"God, let there be a better tomorrow."

Blood is thicker than water

Yesterday night, i fought with my cousin, Bob
Yea, those childish fights where we picked on each other
But yesterday, he went way beyond my limit
And i fucking hit him hard on his stomach
In front of our parents, right
Then we left each other with hatred deep in our hearts
I don't give a fuck about him
Then he suddenly called me this afternoon
"Sis, I'm sorry about yesterday. I know it's my fault. I love you!"
Then we giggled

Rave on the sweet memories

Maybe i think too much
But as i browsed through those pictures
It made me wonder if I'm simply busy with school or I just lost my social circle
How heartwrenching
I need these friends
And most importantly, boyfriend, don't you realise anything?
Coz i need this life back

"Now return me my life!"

Famous or Infamous

His friends ask him about me
Her friends ask her about me
To add on, i don't even fucking know this people la cibai

Everyone's been asking
"Who's he, who's he?"
Bitch, why the fuck do I get noticed everytime?
Such life with no privacy
Life's like that in secondary school
Now, here I am again, in poly!
I don't need the attention so spare me some privacy pretty please
Fuck!

"Eh, cheebs! My problem la who i want to hang out with!

Ask ask! I don't even know why you cheebs bother!"

The way I see it

I miss you

but i can't be bothered anymore

coz i'm not getting anything from you

and no, i don't blame you

i take the blame coz i asked for it

serve me right

run away now

Tell me what the fuck is wrong, with me!

My heart's bleeding

i've never got that from you

how cold

entice me with your antics boy

"And i'm fine alone"

Slow down a bit..No?

School has become en enemy

breaks mean working in the computer lab

friends mean group mates

projects simply mean, DEATH

what's new?

projects, tests, projects, tests

and A?

"I'm tired to work for an A"

Mr Erwin and our assumptions

Yesterday night, Erwin assumed he's cute
i assumed he's lame
those assumptions


Erwin : Eh nadz, your sister and my brother got something on huh?

Nadz : Huh? Hann? With Tengku? Since when sia?

Erwin : You don't know ah? Tengku's room got your sis's photo you know..i found it in his bag

Nadz : Hahahaha, serious shit or what? Later i ask her

Erwin : Hahaha, ok

Silence

Erwin : Eh, if Tengku with Hannah, then you be my girlfriend la

Nadz : Hahahaha, ok! Cute right?! You sleep first, then you dream ok?

Erwin : Ok, mission failed

Nadz : You're such a loser la! No other tactic meh?

Erwin : Ala, paiseh ah..I shy sia when i'm with you

Nadz : Gi mampos ah, bye

Toooooooot.. tooooooot... tooooooooot


One word : Fucking merepek (ok, that's two!)

and Hannah's so getting it from me! Gatal or what sia that brat..cheebs

"Amusing assumptions"

I am torn

I lived a miserable Sunday

I'm all choked up and you're ok

M d K h a i r u l

Threesome on a Saturday, Rebel when you're down

Sleepless night on a Friday
swollen eyes on a Saturday, too much crying
how heartwrenching
but i'll do fine,
rather than torment myself thinking about you baby
we're going to be fine
we've survived one day of not contacting
i could just pop pills and die


Saturday shouldn't be a sad one
so i threesom-ed
and i must say it was awesome
a lot of flashbacks on how much we hated one another when we were in sec school but how ironic, we got closer as we got older
and yes we talked a lot
what else? love shits of course


Dee's supposed to make her first move to her prince
Ash, to focus on his future
and me, to let go and join the single club
they strongly agree on me letting go of J
i'm on the verge, but i'm too weak


Among us three, i did the most sheesha-ing
at least, i felt a lot better
why not? heavy sheesha-ing and two cans of redbulls
ya ya, i'll be fine


I felt so down
i decided to rebel
and i reached home near 12
i got scolded and then grounded
but for once, it felt so good to get scolded

"I miss you"